Eating Jewish

You ever learn that Gemara where Bruriah lists all the kosher foods that are stand-ins for non-kosher food, in order to show that even though we are commanded to sanctify ourselves, Judaism isn’t restrictive? What a preachy, party-line, pile of s**t.*

There’s this girl I work with who is the nicest, most awesome person I know. I love talking to her and hanging out at work, but even though I’m dying to have a real relationship with her, I can’t, because, you guessed it, she’s not Jewish. And no matter that every sign in the world points to God dropping her in my lap, it’s too bad. So now, according to Bruriah, I’m supposed to find a Jewish girl to match up. But the chances of that happening are a million to one, because A) I’m not ready to commit to dating someone for marriage and 95% of the Jewish girls I would be compatible with are only interested in that, and B) she’s PERFECT for me!


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