The Nut List

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Anyone who believes less than me is a heathen.  Anyone who believes more than me is a nut.

I’m a patchwork Jew.  I’m a collection of memes and tropes and minhagim.  I’ve clearly gotten more religious over time and have taken on things I never would have thought – tearing toilet paper before Shabbos?  But I still identify as a moderate.  I’m amazed by the breathless tales of the uber-observant.  To let you know how Seriously they take their mitzot: “so then I realized I wasn’t going to make it home by Shabbos so I pulled off the highway and parked in the worst neighborhood in the world, stashed my keys under a crack hooker, and then started the 45 mile walk home while gangs are shooting at me.

Uphill.  In the snow” or “… and I opened the refrigerator and the light popped on.  I was stuck.  There wasn’t a [non-Jewish person] around.  Everything melted, there was a river running through the kitchen…”

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Posted by on Thursday, May 2nd, 2013. Filed under Jewish Blogs. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.